The Quest #2: The 4 Faces Of Manhood

Yesterday, we started this Journey, got into the starting block, on the starting line, And I gave you some presuppositions that would strongly influence the messages. I want to give two of the most important ones – just as a recap. 

First of all, I said Manhood is in a state of confusion today. What I want you comrades to recognize is right below the surface of today’s society, is a kind of cauldron of confusion of men who don’t really know what it means to be a man.

Well, they know generally, kind of how a man acts in certain ways; knows how to make a living; knows he needs to get married; but as far as what it is that’s noble and right about a man -- substantive in a man’s soul – he’s lost. And so he kind of catches every little wind that comes through the culture, thinking “maybe that’s what it means to be a man.” But there’s not anything permanent that can last for a lifetime.

I also told you that along with that confusion, there is no compelling vision that calls a man up. There are a lot of things -- as you comrades know -- that call a man down. But very few things, especially very few visions, that really call a man up to be the kind of man he really needs to be.

I also made a few promises to you. I just want to remind you of the 5 promises that I gave to you.

First of all, I said that if you could stick with me the whole series, you would have a clear, compelling definition of what it meant to be a man.

I also said that you will have a manhood language that would allow you to converse with other men in this space in a substantive way for your life, that would call you up.

I told you that, you would make some significant discoveries about yourself. And I want you to know the reason I can make that promise is because men who’ve been in the program in the past – some of those men have not only made significant discoveries, but some of the most life-changing discoveries of their whole life. According to their wives and friends and family, by the end of the program, they walked out different men and have remained different men. And a much better man at that.

Then lastly I said that if you finish the series, you would leave with your own personal manhood plan – FOR YOU -- that would be your vision for your life.

Tomorrow, I’m going to share with you a draft of that plan. We’re going to walk through it so you can get underway. But just to let you know, that’s the most important thing that you will do, is that you will script for yourself a plan – a noble plan – that will call you, for your own personal life and your own personal situation UP! And in the soul of every man, he wants to go up.

Manhood’s Four Faces

As we embark on our journey into authentic manhood, It is good to start today by giving an initial vision of what a real man looks like. What the world is needing from men today is a life of balance. A real man is a balance of 4 expressions. Today I’m going to give you four faces of manhood, each complementing the other; each synchronizing with the other; each balancing the other. And this is what the world is looking for, and in some ways, this is what we’re looking for. So let me give you the four faces of manhood. Here’s the first face:

1️⃣It is called the King Face. The face of the King. This face doesn’t come easily in a man’s life. The fact is this face has to be cultivated over time. There has to be a number of ingredients that go into helping a man put this face on. It’s through parents, mentors, heroes, stories, faith; persevering through special problems. It comes about through integrating his religion/faith into his life. All of which creates in the soul of a man over time.

This principle is forged in the crucible of this man’s life: a love of the right. That’s the King Face. It’s the love of the right. The love of right over comfort and circumstances.

It’s the face a man shows when he’s asked to cheat on a business deal. It’s the face a man shows when it comes time to keep his promise, although now keeping his promise is going to be extremely difficult. It’s the face a man shows when he makes good on his debt. The face shows when he risks his own life to save another person, or when he’s on a business trip and he’s propositioned by a female companion. It’s the face he shows when he could take advantage of someone else, but he chooses not to. Or he stands up to a good friend whose life is out of control, and risks the friendship in order to call the friend back to what is noble, and what is just. It’s that face he shows without blinking in the face of danger. It’s the fact that doesn’t waiver – even though he knows there are risks and consequences by standing up to that which is ignoble and wrong. It is the King Face.

This is the face that reflects righteous energy. In the Bible you see that face reflected in the prophet Nathan who comes to King David to confront him about his secret adultery. Knowing that when he confronts the king, he’s laying it all on the line, and the king with just a word could either banish him from the kingdom forever, or have him put to death. And yet, he looks into the face of a king and says, “You are the man! And you’re wrong.” It’s also the face that King David who, on hearing the words of a righteous man, instead of saying ‘I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Ms. Bathsheba.’ In the midst of being confronted with the wrong, he put on the King Face. And he says, “I’ve sinned. You’re right; I’ve done wrong.”

This face is characterized by a number of things. It’s characterized by strong convictions, courageous moral choices, a servant spirit, righteous leadership.

And as I noted, it doesn’t come easily. It is forged in the crucible of life. Now every comrade is in the process of developing or snuffing out the King Face in your life. Because it comes with those decisions – sometimes, like climbing a mountain, the small hills at the beginning of your life – and sometimes the issues get much greater and grander, but each time you scale the summit, the King Face grows stronger and brighter.

You see that King Face in Scripture in verses like this: Proverbs 4:18, it says: “But the path of the righteous is like the light of the dawn that shines brighter and brighter until the full day.” Now I know when you read that verse, it’s a little bit poetic, but look at it for a moment. You know everyday begins with dawn. Then the sun will come up and it will grow stronger and stronger, and brighter, and brighter in its intensity through the day. The writer of Proverbs tells us that’s what righteousness is like in life. It grows stronger through life.

A man who puts on the King Face grows stronger through his life. His life doesn’t fade. A lot of us, know that there are a lot of exploits of comrades in the early days who did a lot of things that were wrong. They thought it was cool to sleep around on their wife, or to party all night, or whatever. But you know, that kind of lifestyle over a period of time grows weaker through the years, doesn’t it? But not the righteous, they start with small light, and as life goes on, their manhood gets brighter and brighter until the full day. And that’s what the writer is saying here. The King Face is part of manhood.

He also says in Proverbs 20:7 these words; “A righteous man who walks in his integrity, how blessed are his sons after him.” Now for those of us who have sons, that should mean a lot. Because there are a lot of things you can give your sons: trips, gear, time with dad, showing up at his school games, big hugs, but what the writer of Proverbs says  is the thing that you can give your son the most is your integrity. How blessed are sons after him, because you build into their soul a substance that they can’t get anywhere else, and it builds a solid core out of which they can live their own life. But if that core isn’t built, then they are like a paper house. How blessed are the sons after him! This is what the King Face is all about; it’s a man who reflects righteous energy all through his life, and he grows brighter through the years. And you know what? By the time you get to be 50 and 60, and you look around, you don’t compare wealth and houses and cars so much anymore; you compare character. And your good name – if you still have one. That’s what the King Face is all about.

2️⃣ Then there’s a second face that a man wears. It’s called the Warrior Face. It’s the warrior face that says, ‘We can take the company national! Let’s do it!’ It’s the Warrior Face that says ‘you know, I’m going to lose weight.’ And then it does. It’s the Warrior Face that says ‘I’m going to repay that debt, even though I don’t know how I’m going to get out of debt.’ That’s the Warrior Face. And as you know, that face is the most honored and celebrated of all the men’s faces. We love warriors, don’t we? We love to celebrate men who are warriors. We celebrate the warriors in legendary figures like Shaka Zulu, Washington or Alexander the Great. We love to celebrate the warriors in business leaders like Dangote or Elon Musk or Donald Trump. Or sports warriors like Usain Bolt or Kiprotich, KK, Messi, CR9, Mosalah. We go the movies and we enjoy seeing fictional warriors, like a gladiator, or even a real-life replay of real warriors. All that stirs the soul of a man because there’s something within us that enjoys a good fight. And that’s the Warrior Face. It’s the man who can take life head-on and win; It’s the man who works the hardest or the longest and outlasts the competition. We like the Warrior Face. Now sometimes the Warrior Face can get out of control. Sometimes we can enjoy that in a humorous way.

Well, sometimes the warrior comes out in us in extremes, and we get out of control, but here’s what I want you to know about the warrior. This is a face reflecting conquering energy.

Conquering energy. This is the face characterized by initiative. The warrior goes out after. It’s the face characterized by protecting. The warrior is the one who shields and defends. It provides. It goes out and gets and says, ‘I’m going to take care of you. No matter what it takes.’ It’s the face that perseveres in the midst of all kinds of adversity, when when the marriage seems getting worse, or in financial/housing/fees/Jobs trouble . It goes on. It’s the face that fights. Not allowing evil laws pass without being contested, without a fight, Not Passive. The only condition for evil to thrive is for good men to do nothing. Warriors are not quitters even in the face of opposition e.g Nehemiah, And the true Warrior Face is not a destructive force. It’s a very positive energy force. Warriors don’t say ‘I don’t need to finish this. I’ve worked hard, but this is just too much.’

Warriors says  “We’re going to get this done.  But that comes through that kind of conquering energy. “I’m not going to quit! I’m going to finish!” “ I’m going to pay it back.” “I’m going to get the job done!” “We’re going to make this work!” All that comes from an energy within. It’s called the Warrior. 

You see that in Scripture where in 1 Timothy, it says these words. Paul is writing to a young man and I think as he writes to the young man, he’s calling – and this is what men need to do – he’s calling the warrior out of this younger man. So he says to Timothy: “Pursue righteousness and godliness and faith, and love and perseverance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of faith and take hold [the word really means ‘to seize.’] seize the eternal life for which you were called.” Now I want you to look at just those terms for a moment, because those are what I call noble upturns. Godliness, righteousness, faith. Those things are not easily seized in any man’s life. Love, perseverance. Those are the kinds of things that you have to work hard for – you have to fight for. And it takes a while to take hold of those things. But here’s an older man, looking into a young man’s face and calling the warrior out, saying, ‘Take up the sword and make these things work for your life. Bring them into your life.” But it comes through the warrior.

3️⃣Here’s a third face, the face of the Lover. The Lover is a face that is as unnatural to man as the Warrior is natural, because love is more difficult for most of us as men. It’s the Lover that picks up his wife’s real needs; it’s the Lover who is willing to let go of another good job/work/business deal in order to spend more time at home. It’s the Lover who can open his heart and share the things that he really feels, rather than hide those because he feels like he has to have a front for strength. But he can crack open the door and share the hurt in his life and the pain, and he can connect around that kind of sensitivity of feelings in a world of emotion.

This is the face, reflecting romantic energy. This is the face characterized by tenderness, sensitivity, sacrificial care, emotional openness, physical affection.

Well, this face is seen in Scripture in such verses as Ephesians 5:25, when the Apostle Paul gives a tall order to men in every generation. He says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church.” And he says – here’s how He loved the church.

Here’s how you are to put on the face of the Lover. Jesus Christ gave Himself up for the church, and if you are a husband who knows how to love, you’ll give yourselves up for your wives, as well. The face of the Lover.

4️⃣Then finally there is the face of the Friend. You know, many men don’t have friends. I’m talking about real friends, and part of the reason we don’t have friends, at least in the world we’re living – the kind of friends that connect with us at a soul level -- is quite frankly, we don’t have time for friends, do we? We want a friend – we want that person to give us his time; to invest in us, and talk to us, and support us, but we just don’t have the time.

And so, we live in these very superficial relationships, where no one around us do we feel close enough to, to really trust with the secret things of our life. And no one that we’ll let talk tough to us when someone needs to get in our face. That requires time.

And what’s true of mountain climbing is true of manhood. You can’t climb the mountain of manhood disconnected from other men. It’s almost a universal principle that if you’re going to be well, it is a universal principle – if you’re going to be the kind of man you’re supposed to be – you have to be connected with other men who can speak into your life; who can call out the best in you; who can cheer for your successes; admire your efforts and be your friend, because that’s what a real friend is.

This a face reflecting connecting energy – the Friend face. And it’s characterized by things like loyalty, and accountability and challenge; and fun. We need men who can connect with some other men on something more than just the superficialities of life e.g Soccer, BBQ etc. You we need, in some way connect –  join – with some other man where we can begin to talk with a man about some of the deep things in our hearts. It’s also a friend who comes around who has noticed in your life the good things where no one else is noticing – and compliments you on it. It’s the Friend who comes up along side you when he sees you beginning to stray from the path and because of the deep relationship that you have, he can call you back. But a lot of comrades don’t have friends because they themselves are not friend-worthy.

Are you friend-worthy? To be friend-worthy means you have to – you have to have connecting energy to other men. You have to be willing to risk and to reach out, and to spend time with and cultivate another relationship.

Here’s the way the Scripture says it. In Proverbs 17:17, it says, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” I bet for some of you – and where you are in life, because of the adversity that you’re in, you say, “I’d love to have a comrade like that next to me right now.” But a friend loves at all times. Scripture also says in Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” We need another man rubbing up against us to rub off some of the hard spots in our life. That takes friendships.

So these four faces are the four faces of manhood. Hopefully, synchronized and balanced together. The King Face; the Warrior Face; the Lover Face; the Friend Face. Now what I want to do in conclusion is make just a few final – but important observations about these faces.

Some Important Observations About These Four Faces

Here’s the first. All too often these honorable faces of manhood are replaced by some ugly caricatures.

The King face – if we lean too far to the right of the King Face you don’t get the King anymore – you get a tyrant. Isn’t that right? And if you lean too far to the left on a King Face you don’t get a king who’s got righteous energy you’ve got an abdicator. You’ve got someone who has compromised himself; has thrown down the sword and surrendered righteousness.

The Warrior Face—if you lean too far to the right, you don’t get a real warrior; you get a destroyer. You get someone who’s abusive, harsh – a person who hurts, not only himself, but his family. If he leans too far to the left, you don’t get a warrior at all – you get a wimp. Someone who’s – who has no conquering energy; just gives up – surrenders. When you see that in sports – when you see – after a game, or when the score gets too far ahead, you can see the opponent drop his head and he’s surrendered. The warrior’s gone. These great hulks of men – the warrior spirit has left them. A lot of the guys who have given up the warrior – it’s not worth it.

The Lover Face, if you lean too far to the right, you become critical and harsh. You’re not someone who people are drawn to, much less your family, or your sons or daughters because you are constantly critiquing them, and very rarely are you loving them. Pointing out what they did wrong, rather than embellishing what they did right. Not picking up on the real needs because oftentimes you’re so focused on your own. If you lean too far to the left, you become cold and withdrawn. You become a rock and an island. Disconnected from the love relationships around you. 

You could be a Friend but if you lean too far to the right, you become a user.  Someone said the world would speed up so quick to where – rather than have friends – we would take them, use them, throw them away. That’s how we treat our friends. Lean too far to the right, you become a user. If you lean too far to the left, you become a loner: the disconnected guy; the friendless male.

Often the honorable faces become ugly caricatures. And then the world reacts to men and it says, “See! All men are brutes! All men are insensitive!” All Men are the same. Have you heard those words before? “All men are loners! They just use people.” Oftentimes, those are the faces, but they’re just caricatures of the real deal.

Because of our morally compromised culture, many men today lack the King in their life. And without a King the Warrior becomes unrestrained. If you don’t have a King in your life, the Warrior can become unrestrained, hurting lives, including your own in the process. You see, if what a man has in his life is a strong Warrior but a weak King, the Warrior gets out of control. It begins to rob and pillage and cheat and fornicate, and beat and abuse, and over-indulge, because there is no King riding the Warrior, and helping the Warrior live for the right things. The Warrior without a King is a destroyer. And oftentimes that’s happened today in our world where our world kind of honors a dubbed-down immoral masculinity.

Our increasing feminized culture has emasculated the Warrior in many young men. The result has been the creation of what I call the soft male, indecisive as to direction and weak as to leadership.

We live in a culture that increasingly disconnects father from sons and really, in the last 30 years, has really spurred on the Warrior spirit in women. And as men have grown quiet in that environment, and as young men are raised primarily in overly dominated female environments, what it’s done is it’s stolen the Warrior out of a lot of young men’s lives. They’ve grown up where the Warrior has been suppressed because the right spirit of a Warrior is usually called out of a young man by older men, calling him to become that kind of Warrior.

But oftentimes, in a female environment the Warrior is downplayed or suppressed.  And what you get is what I call the ‘feminized man.’ Not the effeminate man who has feminine characteristics – the feminized man who can be strong and tough-looking on the outside, but when it comes to initiative, they wait. When it comes to leadership, they’re soft. When it comes for the moment of decision, they defer – often to a woman. And the reason they do is because the Warrior is gone – instead it’s the ‘soft male.’ Here’s what I want you to know and this is the last point today, and we’ll close.

Our world today is desperate to see in men this four-faced balance of manhood. That’s what our world wants to see, North, South, East and West. Those are the four points on a compass. Winter, Spring, Summer, Fall – those are four seasons in the year. Earth, wind, fire, water – those are four elements on the earth. King, Warrior, Lover, Friend – those are the four faces of manhood.

And Comrades, here’s the question for you today: When you look in the mirror, what kind of man do you see? Next week, we’re going to start unwrapping in earnest our own manhood.

👍🏽 Robert Lewis

▶️ Men Of Courage Playlist

💪🏽Men Of Courage WhatsApp Group 

📩 Join eMail List

---

ℹ️ One Way Ministries

📞‪‪+256783171572

📧 info.1wayministries@gmail.com

✆ WhatsApp Community

ⓕ Facebook

▶️ YouTube

The Quest #1: At the Starting Line | The Quest For Authentic Manhood

As Fathers’ Day is forthcoming, allow me to share a Blog Series on the Quest For Authentic Manhood.

Here are some strange facts to consider:

• It’s possible to lead a cow upstairs but not downstairs.
• It’s physically impossible for you to lick your elbow.
• Before this day is over, anyone who hears that it’s physically impossible to lick your elbow will try to lick their elbow.
• But here’s the strangest fact of all: Even though there are about 4 billion Men on the planet, most men cannot tell you what a man is. Not succinctly. Not compellingly; not with a sense of empowerment that makes you want you live UP as a man.

Most of us do not have that kind of core definition of masculinity for our lives that drives us and sustains us in everyday life.

The Quest for Authentic Manhood is kind of a foundational level of the study of masculinity. Its focus is on a man’s core identity. The key elements, which we’ll be going through, is a man’s wounds. It’s looking kind of at the past that has shaped or sometimes misshapen him. We’ll be talking about that in the days to come. We’ll also come up with that compelling definition of manhood that I told you 4 billion men on the planet have a hard time coming up with. And then we overview and look at, pick at a few of a man’s primary issues.

The major challenge is a phrase that is ‘the boy in you must die.’ There is a transition that has to take place in a man’s life where he moves from boyhood to manhood, and if that isn’t a very specific transition in his life, then even as he grows older, he still relates more to boyishness than to noble manhood. There are many men walking around in bodies 40, 50, 60 years old who are still boys. Not men. So, the boy in you must die.

For some of you today, it’s going to be the beginning of laying a new foundation for your manhood. For some of you – throughout the years you’ve already laid your foundation, but there are some cracks in it and so throughout the blogs, we’re going to fill in some of those cracks, to help us become a more solid foundation.

What I’d like to do today is start by just giving you 5 of the presuppositions that I’m going to be working off of that will help you understand where I’m coming from as we walk through this blog.

So here are 5 basic presuppositions I’m going to be bringing to this particular manhood journey. 

1️⃣ The first is this: Manhood is in a state of confusion. That’s going to be one of my basic and most fundamental premises. Manhood is in a state of confusion? right below the surface of men’s lives is confusion. And there’s a lack of confidence as to what it really means to be a man. today’s young men – particularly those 25 and younger -- are nearing a state of masculine meltdown. They have no clear identity as to their masculinity or what it means to be a man. They’re drifting, and underneath the surface of their lives is confusion.

Three words– or 3 phrases from Young Men’s lives:

a. They express disappointment with life. They say, you know, that they got out of college with all these expectations about life becoming more thrilling, and as they move through life, it just simply becomes more heavy. And the things that were fun in their lives seem to drain out; there seems to be a heaviness of responsibility and when they hit about 40 or 45, it seems like they just kind of hit the wall. All the things that were promised to them early on, that would give them life – once they attained those things, they didn’t really deliver life. And so a disappointment kind of settled in over their spirits. They weren’t really sure what to do about it. They only knew they felt it.

b. Another word is ‘pain.’ Underneath the surface of men’s lives there’s a lot of pain that they haven’t resolved. And they don’t know how to talk about it because they look at the guys around them, and those guys seem like they’re doing all right. It seems like they have it together, but underneath their life is pain. Some of that pain relates to their dads -- an unresolved issue there. Some of that pain relates to their dreams, and things that never came to fruition, that they always hoped for, wished for and wanted, but never came about. Some of it had to with failures in their lives – things that they had messed up and screwed up, and they didn’t know how to go back and fix it, or get over it. So there is pain there that they needed to talk about. But they didn’t know who to talk to.

c. Another word Is ‘loneliness.” Isn’t it amazing that we’re in a world today where we’re wired everywhere -- we can talk to anybody. We have access everywhere, and yet, with the increase in technology, there has been a decrease in intimacy. We really know people less and less, and in today’s society men in particular are lonely. They know everybody, but no one knows them. No one has access to them – and they’re not sure how to get out and get connected in a way that would be satisfying to them. I tell you all that because men are in a state of confusion.

2️⃣Secondly, I believe confused men – those kind of confused men – will create major problems in life. I don’t think most of us need to be told that.

All we have to do is watch TV or read a book or read the newspaper, or hear the latest statistics from the government, and we will find that most of the social problems in our society -- for whatever reasons – seem to rest at the feet of men. For some reason, as strong as we are, we are a fragile bunch. We are. And most of the marriage problems that we experience in our world today oftentimes are men problems. Now I’m speaking as a Family Man, and I can tell you that is the fact! When you go to statistics, what you’ll find is most kids today who are truant or who have problems also have absent dads, or deadbeat dads. 90% of all the major crimes globally are from men. 100% of all the rapes are from men. Most if not all the burglaries are from men. Most if not all the offenses against families or children come from men. Most if not of all drunken drivers are men. You may wonder ‘Are Men Really That Bad?”, “what’s wrong with us?” It’s because confused men create major problems.

“The central problem of every society is to define appropriate roles for it’s men.” That’s the central problem.

And why do men need clear direction and appropriate roles? It’s because we’re a fragile group and without clear direction – without clear understanding of who we are and what we’re intended to do, confused men create major problems.

3️⃣Thirdly, I believe confused men also settle for less in their life.

The clearest picture of an empty life is the suburban man, who gets up at the same hour every weekday morning, takes the same train/taxi/matatu/bus to work in the city, performs the same tasks at the office, lunches at the same places, comes home on the same city train/taxi/matatu/bus each night; Goes to church but does not really know why he goes, and moves through a routine, mechanical existence year after year until he finally retires at age 65 and very soon thereafter dies of disease, possibly brought on by repressed anger. Though perhaps he died from boredom.

The point is this: many confused men – in whatever setting – settle into an empty rut in their life, because they don’t know what else to do. Comrades, do you understand how oftentimes we’re programmed? About campus age, we think we’ve got this job we’re supposed to have, and money we’re supposed to make; and things we’re supposed to have, and a wife we’re supposed to marry. And we move into that thinking because we’ve been told that if we have all those things we’ll be alive. And what happens is we move into that process – kind of like on a conveyor belt – and we move into what I call a ’standardized manhood process’ and after a while we don’t like it. But we don’t know what to do about it. And we have no higher calling on our life other than ourselves! And that doesn’t satisfy. Confused men settle for less.

4️⃣ I believe there is no lofty vision of manhood today that’s compelling to men, the kind of manhood that calls men up.

A frustrated young man wrote this following poem. He said this: What is a man? Is he someone who’s strong and tall? Or is he taut and talented as be plays ball? Is he someone who is hardened enough, Who smokes, and drinks and swears enough? Is he someone who chases women hard with a quest to conquer – Or without dropping his guard? Is he someone with a good business mind Who gets ahead of the others with his nose to the grind? Or is he someone who tries his best While not really caring for any of the rest? What is a man? Does any one know? Tell me! Who is the prototype? To whom shall I go?

There are a lot of men like that – maybe not expressing it that way, but at the core of their existence, they’re saying ‘who is the prototype? A real man? And to whom shall we go?”

In 1 Corinthians 13, the Apostle Paul makes this statement. He says, “When I was a child, I used to speak as a child, and think as a child, and reason as a child. But when I became a man, I gave up childish things.”

We may want to ask Paul because he made this statement, ‘but when I became a man’; “how did you do that? How did you become a man? And when you became a man, you said you put away childish things. What were those things that you put away? And what new things did you embrace? And Paul, did they give you life? I know I had fun when I was a kid – can you have fun as a man? Is there a better calling than childhood and boyishness? Is there something to pull me up to a higher mountain where the challenges are just as thrilling and the view is just as magnificent, and even more so? Can you get me there?”

That’s what I want to know. I want to know how to become a man. I want to know what real men do, and how they feel, and how they act, but it doesn’t seem anyone knows today, how to answer that question: What is a man? Which leads me to my premise number 5.

5️⃣ I believe the Bible has helpful insights to all of the above…to all of the other four presuppositions, and I am aware, by the way, that there are all kinds of men reading this. Some of you are Anglicans, Born Again, Baptist, some of you are Episcopal, some of you are Jews; some of you are Catholics; some of you come from a very mixed background – You’ve come from everywhere – you’ve had all kinds of mixture in your past. And that’s okay. There are some of you here who are non-churchgoers. In fact, there are some of you are cynical about religion altogether.

And quite frankly, if you and I sat down and talked for a little while, there’d probably be some really good reasons why. Let me put you all at ease just for a moment. I have not religious axes to grind. You’re not going to hear me do that. I’m not going to cram my religion down your throat.

This is a manhood journey –  The only reason is to help you become better men, and I believe that’s why you’re reading this, as well.

Now, I’m going to use the Bible from time to time and I’m going to use it, because it’s great literature, first of all. Secondly, it has time-tested wisdom in it. It’s been proven out over the ages, and thirdly, it’s because we need its help. We really do.

So these are my 5 pre-suppositions:

1️⃣Manhood is in a state of confusion;

2️⃣ Confused men create major problems;

3️⃣ Confused men settle for less;

4️⃣ There is no lofty vision of manhood calling us up. I mean, really. Do you watch TV commercials today? Because they speak to our culture. And do you know what you see about manhood when you look into the fact of commercials? You see the other guy in the beer commercial looking past these women mesmerized by a bottle of beer. That’s manhood in the 21st Century.

5️⃣ The Bible is going to help us get there, as well as the other material that we’ll be talking about in the next few days.

Now let me finish up – just making some 5 bold promises to you if you stick it out with me over the course of the whole blog series, and I really hope that you do. Because if you do this, I can deliver on these 5 promises.

1️⃣ First of all, you’ll have a clear definition of manhood. Remember at the beginning we said most men can’t tell you succinctly with a compelling kind of passion what a man is? If you’ll stick with me over these blogs, I can promise you this: You will leave here with a definition of manhood that you’re excited about. And not only excited about, excited about living your life for and excited about telling your sons about. That’s the kind of definition we want to craft together in our time together.

2️⃣ Secondly, you will develop a new manhood language. You see in our modern culture, we don’t have that language. And because we don’t have a language, our souls kind of stay starved for some substance about real manhood issues, and without that kind of substance, what we end up doing is we end up talking about our soccer, or cars, or the jobs/work or about our business and we stay right here on the surface. But we never talk about anything of destiny. Soulish kind of stuff that feeds the masculine soul. We have to build new bridges to one another, and those new bridges are built on a manhood language and so over the course of this Blog, you’re going to hear terms like servant leader and feminized man and rejecting passivity and leading courageously. You’re going to hear about conventional manhood and manhood ceremonies, and manhood wounds and things like that. You’re going to hear phrases like the boy in you must die. You’re going to hear other phrases like the king in you is what decides. Or if you’re not being admired by another man, you’re being hurt every day. And when you hear those phrases, with another – when you hear that this guy needs to unpack, you’ll know exactly what you’re talking about. And the other men you’re telling it to will know exactly what you’re saying. And that creates bridges of depth into the masculine soul that helps us live up – rather than down.

3️⃣Thirdly, you will make some significant personal discoveries about yourself. You know there’s a lot, as I’ve said, about manhood that lies right beneath the surface of men’s lives. But you know what we have on us? We have a lid on, just like streets have those manhole covers – we have our own manhole cover over our lives. Because it’s scary down under there.

And sometimes if you watch the kind of government workers who tend our streets, they have a special instrument to pull that manhole cover up, because otherwise you can’t pry it up. It’s just too heavy. That’s the way it feels for a lot of men’s lives. It’s just too heavy to get that off so I can look inside. MOC-Men Of Courage becomes the tool to help you pull the lid open and look inside, and though it may seem fearful at first, what I want you to know, it’s the keys that are down in there to unlock your life. And that’s what we need to get down in there and find them. Because they can open up a whole new adventure for you. And over the course of this Blog, you will make some exciting discoveries – some significant ones about yourself.

4️⃣ You will make some new friends here who are pursuing a common goal. You need to be in a Men’s small group, and if you’re in a small group, and if you have the courage to open up your life and take a look inside and be willing to reveal yourself to other men, there are going to be some new connections made with other men. Just Comrades talking to one another, getting to know one another, being encouraged by one another. So, I want to really encourage you to go into the small groups and be a part of that.

5️⃣ And then the last thing is that you will have your own personalized plan for achieving authentic manhood. I need you to do one thing for me. Over the course of the blogs, we’re going to give you this. In fact, I’ll explain this in two days to you: Your Manhood Plan because the thing we’re trying to do is establish a new manhood identity for every man in here. But to do that, you need to do that work for yourself. You need to have your own personal plan for manhood.

So in a couple of days, we’re going give you the sheet, and then you’re going to use it as a draft to take the things that you’re read day to day and you’re going to process it for your life. It’s going to ask you to look back on your life and what shaped you as a man; it’s going to ask you to make a good evaluation of what you’re doing right now. It’s going to ask you to think about where you want to end up in life, and then to put all that down and keep refining it, and at the end of the blogs, we’re actually going to ask you to type it up and share it with me. Every man’s got to turn in a plan to me, but this plan can be the most profitable thing in your life, if you’re willing to take a hard look at your life. Men need to know where they’re going and when they know where they’re going, they become a very positive and powerful force – not only in their own lives – but in their family’s life and in the community. And that’s what we want to help you achieve. A plan for your life. Okay?

So, 5 presuppositions I’ve given you here today that are going to shape my messages over the next 25 days now.

And then 5 promises that I can deliver on, if you’re willing to stick with me throughout the whole blog series. Men, welcome to the Quest for Authentic Manhood.

👍🏽 Robert Lewis

▶️ Men Of Courage Playlist

💪🏽Men Of Courage WhatsApp Group 

📩 Join eMail List

---

ℹ️ One Way Ministries

📞‪‪+256783171572

📧 info.1wayministries@gmail.com

✆ WhatsApp Community

ⓕ Facebook

▶️ YouTube

GOD’s Present Intentions | The Church As A Window

 

Does God have any good news for now—for the present? Yes! His good news is not only for the future. Think of how He taught His disciples to pray: “Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven” (Matthew 6:9-10). On earth as it is in heaven! We may have recited this prayer so often that it has become meaningless. But it is not meaningless—it is powerful!

Where is God’s will done? According to the Lord’s Prayer, it is done in heaven. But Jesus taught us to pray that God’s will would be done on earth as it is done in heaven. God has intentions that His will be done, in the present, on earth. What would happen if God’s will were done on earth as it is done in heaven? What would happen if God’s will were done in your community or in your nation as it is in heaven?  Earth would be very much like heaven! (Of course, God’s will is done perfectly in heaven; on earth, in the present, it is only done incompletely.)

Knowing God’s Intentions and His Will

What are some general aspects of God’s will for the present? 

• In John 14:13 we see that, if we love God, we obey Him. God’s will is that we do His will! 
• Matthew 28:18-20 affirms that doing His will includes discipling others to obey His will, too.

Often, people remember only one part of the charge that Jesus gave to His church in the Great Commission—to go into all the world and preach the Gospel. But that is not the whole task. It is just the beginning of the task. After people have come to Christ, we are to disciple them to do God’s will. If we have not done that, we have not finished the Great Commission’s task.  We must also disciple others to obey all that God has commanded. 

How do we know God’s intentions—His will? We do not instinctively know His will, yet we have often even made knowing His will overly complex.  We need revelation from His Word and His Spirit for what it means to do His will. 

• Psalms 119:99-100 reminds us to meditate on and obey His Word. 
• Proverbs 2:1-5 urges us to accept God’s Word to know His will. 
• John 16:13 affirms that it is the Holy Spirit who guides us into all truth.

Abraham’s chief servant provides an excellent model for us.  He made an oath with Abraham to go back to Abraham’s country to get a wife for Isaac.  He left for his journey and as he was going, the Lord led him.  He had no idea what to do and how to find a wife that would agree to return to a foreign land.   So, as he was going, he continued to seek the Lord and each step of the way, the Lord faithfully led him and the servant followed (Gen 24:48).  There are some simple truths for us to learn from in this example:  Be on a journey, seek the Lord as you are going, listen to Him and obey what He shows you to do.  It is of little use to seek to know God’s will if we are not already on the journey of obeying what you already understand of His intentions.

Do all Christians in our community find God’s will this way—searching Scripture, guided by the Spirit and obeying what they understand of what He is showing them? What would happen if all who claim to be Christians in our community would seek to know God’s will as they make decisions about how they are to live and would then obey what their Father told them to do?

God’s Intentions for the Present

What does God tell us in His Word that He wants us to do in our personal lives? Many things! 

• Acts 14:22 urges us to endure hardships. 
• Ephesians 5:17-20 exhorts us to be sober and Spirit-filled—singing and thankful. 
• 1 Thessalonians 4:3 and 11 tell us to live holy, pure, productive lives. 

Do all who call themselves Christians in our community endure hardship? Are they sober and Spirit-filled, singing and thankful? Are they living holy and pure and productive lives? 

What are God’s intentions for our families? 

• In Ephesians 5:21, we are told to be submissive and respectful of one another. 
• Ephesians 6:4 tells us to train our children in holy living. 

What are God’s intentions for our relationships with our brothers and sisters? 

• In John 13:34, we are told to love each other, and 
• John 17:20-23 instructs us to live in unity. 

What would happen if all the Christians in our community sought to know God’s will and live as He commands? What if we all lived holy, pure, productive, respectful lives in our personal lives and families? What if we were united in our relationships with other believers? There would be a revolution! 

What are God’s intentions for our present relationships to the needy of the world? 

• In Romans 13:9, we are commanded to love our neighbors. 
• In James 1:27, we learn we are to care for widows and orphans. 
• In Jeremiah 22:3, 15, and 16, we learn that God expects us to advocate for those in need. 

What are God’s intentions for our relationships to employers, servants, government, and enemies? 

• Colossians 4:1 tells us to be fair to those under our authority. 
• 1 Peter 2:13-15 commands us to respect those in authority over us. 
• Romans 13:1 also exhorts us to submit to those in authority. 
• Luke 6:27, 35, and 36 instruct us to love our enemies and bless them. 

Do all Christians in our community live according to God’s will in these ways? What would happen if, at 9 o’clock next Monday morning, all of those who call themselves Christians would begin to live this way? It would be more than a revolution—it would be a revival! People would be drawn to God.

The impact of our obedience goes far beyond our own relationships with the Lord. We use this drawing to illustrate the significance of our obedience to God’s intentions for the present and the future. We are being watched—not only by God, but also by the broken people of the world. As we obey God, we demonstrate His love and concern for them in the present as well as in the future. This is the way it should be! When the broken people of our community look at us, they should be able see God’s good intentions for both the present and the future.

 

They should see not only His good intentions for the future—the saving grace of God and rescue from eternal death. They should also see the great good news that God has for them NOW. They should see this, but they often cannot. Why? There is a wall that obstructs their vision. This wall is the wall of sin. We like to believe that it is the sin of the world that keeps the broken people in our communities from seeing God’s purposes. No, it is not only the sin of the world—it is our sin and disobedience. It is our unwillingness to live the way God calls us to live in the present representing God’s purposes to the broken world around us.  “We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us” (II Corinthians 5:20).

If you were God, what would you do to that wall? People often say that they would knock the wall down and destroy it! Be careful about that answer, since we are also talking about ourselves! Also, we know from Scripture that, until Jesus returns, sin is not going to be completely removed from the world. Instead, God has done something else with the wall of sin that keeps the world from seeing God’s good intentions. He has put a window in the wall! That window is the Church—the Church of Jesus Christ. God intends, as the broken people of our community look through the window of His Church, that they will see His good news for the present and the future.

The Church as a Window

We use a four-paned window illustration in this lesson. Each pane represents one of the four areas in which Jesus grew—“Wisdom,” “Physical,” “Spiritual,” and “Social.” Because Jesus grew in these four ways, let’s think of them as four areas of God’s concern for human healing and growth. The church is the window through which broken people see God’s good intentions in all of these areas. What do some churches do with this window?

 

• Some churches look at the pane marked “Physical” and say, “We don’t do physical ministry! We leave that to the government and welfare agencies.” When this happens, the window pane is darkened. The broken people of our community cannot see God’s concern for physical needs through the window of the Church.

• Another pane represents God’s intentions for healing of all kinds of social brokenness. Some churches might say: “This is not our mandate. We are not engaged in social work!” The window pane becomes darkened, and broken people cannot observe God’s intentions for social healing through the Church.

• Another pane represents wisdom. Churches might say, “We are engaged in wisdom—but only for people in the Church. They must come into the Church before they can learn God’s wisdom.” When that happens, this pane is darkened. People outside the Church cannot see God’s intentions for their growth in wisdom.

• The final part of the window is the spiritual pane. Churches might say: “Yes! We are called to proclaim the spiritual good news!” When the broken people of the community look through the window of the Church, then, what is the only thing they see if the physical, social, and wisdom panes are darkened? They only see God’s spiritual intentions. The spiritual area is of enormous present and future importance, but broken people may not know this. They may be like Juan, the young man Rudy encountered in a squatter slum of Lima, Peru.  He tore up and swallowed the tract Rudy offered him—to make a point. He was saying, “I’m not interested in spiritual good news for the future. I’m hungry now! Does your God have any concern for me as a hungry, unemployed man—now?”

 

Our churches need to clean their windows! Broken people need to see through all the panes. God wants Juan, and all of his brothers and sisters who are broken, to be able to look through the window of the Church and see God’s good intentions for them in all areas of God’s concern—physical, spiritual, social, and wisdom.

There was an informal survey on a downtown street in the U.S. many people were asked, “If you were facing a major crisis in your life, where would you turn for help?” No one thought to mention the Church! People do not know the Church as the Church that Jesus intended. If your church closed up tomorrow, would your community care?   Would they even notice?

A few years ago, Bob Moffitt was teaching church leaders on the Muslim-dominated island of Mindanoa in the Philippines. Tension between Muslims and non-Muslims was high. The last day of the conference, ten people dressed in Muslim attire came into the church where they met. A hush fell over the audience. The organizers of the conference discovered that these were new Christian converts, delayed four days at military checkpoints on their way to the conference. They told their story. For many years, Christians had come to their village, preaching and handing out tracts. The village people rejected the message. Recently, a group of people had come to the village simply to minister lovingly to needs of the people. Only later did the village people discover that these caring people were Christians. The impact of this ministry was so powerful that these villagers came to Christ. The words of the last speaker, a teenage girl, are words of wisdom to us. Christians had come to her village doing traditional evangelism for years, but only when the Gospel came wrapped in love and good works did it reap a harvest. She concluded with an unforgettable question: “What took you so long?” 

Pictures of the Church

What takes us so long? It is our sin and disobedience. God’s plan for His Church is great! There are a number of metaphors that Paul, Jesus, and Peter used to describe the Church. (A metaphor is a word picture.)

• The Church is a priest. Israel was to be a priest to the nations, and the Church today is like God intended Israel to be in the OT. We are to be a priest to the people outside the Church. As they look, they should see us obeying God’s will and thereby representing who He is.
• The Church is salt and light. We often ask groups of people: “Do you like salt?” Almost everyone does! Then we say, “I’d like to give you an experiment. When you have your next meal, take a large spoonful of salt and eat it.” Their faces immediately react! “You don’t like that? I thought you said you like salt! Oh, you like it, but you don’t like it so concentrated! You want it sprinkled around!”  Our churches are often like a spoonful of salt—too concentrated. God says, “Get out of the spoon! Go into the community. Sprinkle yourselves out there!”
• The Church is an embassy of the Kingdom of God. Jesus sent His disciples out as ambassadors, so our churches are embassies. Embassies, as we know, represent the intentions of the government they represent. We must represent the intentions of the Kingdom to which we belong.
• The Church is a letter. Paul wrote that we are like open letters, read by all. Sometimes, it is hard for people to read God’s letter when they see our lives. We need to be a legible letter that demonstrates God’s good news for the present.
• The Church is also an obedient servant, a good neighbor, and a first taste of something delicious. Bob has a grapefruit tree in his backyard. In the late fall, the grapefruit begins to ripen. He looks for that very first grapefruit that’s ripe and ready to be eaten. He finds it, picks it, and peels it. He can’t wait to take that first bite. It’s delicious! He then knows what the rest of the fruit of that tree will taste like when they become ripe. That is a first fruit. But sometimes we are unripe, immature fruit. When the world bites into us, the taste is bitter. They spit us out. But God wants us to be a delicious first fruit—a first taste of His Kingdom.

 There are other pictures of the Church that we did not cover in the lesson. The Church is the Body of Christ. As a body, the Church should carry out the intentions of its head, Jesus Christ, and each member has a unique function in this body. The Church is also the bride of Christ. God loves the Church with an infinite love. The intimate relationship between Christ and His bride provides high motivation for the Church to do His will. The Church is also the principal administrator of God’s agenda to heal the broken world. It is the communicator and facilitator of the agenda and equips its members to go into every corner of society to do God’s will.

It is important to apply what we learn! We often ask people to draw a window, label each section with one of the four areas of Jesus’ growth, list two new activities in each area that their church could do to demonstrate God’s present intentions in their communities, and commit to discuss these ideas with their church leaders.   As you read this, you too can do this.

There is a new breeze blowing among the churches today as they learn to be embassies of God’s full intentions. This breeze has the mark of the Spirit. It creates a longing to demonstrate God’s full agenda in a broken world. There are individuals and churches whose sails are catching that breeze. It is our prayer that God will use them to turn the breeze into a mighty wind. The people of the Church should be such a clear and compelling witness of Christ’s love for the spiritually, socially, and physically broken that all who see through the window of the Church will say, “What a loving and great God these people have!”[1]

Credit: Bob Moffitt, Disciple Nations Alliance  

---

[1] Several remarks in this narrative have been taken directly from If Jesus Were Mayor, also written by Bob Moffitt. Used by permission.